THE GREATEST OLDIES OF ALL TIME ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- a whole lot of togetherness So, I just got back from a weeklong trip out Wisconsin way to attend a family reunion. This particular branch of the family hails originally from Bavarian Germany, and after crossing the ocean settled down to farming in Wisconsin, later migrating west to Minnesota/North Dakota, and then further north to Saskatchewan because, as my dad surmised, �it wasn�t cold enough, and there wasn�t enough wind�. There were rival events going on at the hotel: our reunion and a great big wedding. We kept getting bumped from the convention room for our little activities, so we ended up doing our registration stuff in the front lobby. My relative David, retired from a professorship at Carleton University, kept supplying us all with beers as we stood around squinting at newcomers, smug behind our nametags. My mom, the Swede, set us up early on for the comedy, as she was compulsively tidying up the motel room, by announcing her intention to take a shower. She then picked up the bottle of rum and the bottle of scotch she and dad had purchased for in-room enjoyment, clutched them to her bosom and crept away. �Ahh, take a shower� we clarified with finger quotes. On the Saturday, we all went on a bus tour of a collection of old homesteads and burial sites of various ancestors. The gravestone of my great-great-grandparents, Georg and Genofeva, had fallen into disrepair, so we spent several minutes in the late afternoon sun trying to reassemble the fallen uprights and mismatched markers (someone had reversed the mutter and vater designation slabs). Sunday morning David went out for 90 minute run in the rain, during which he passed a couple of young guys who called out to him, �Hey, old man, you shouldn�t be passing us�, to which he replied, �I don�t have time for this!� and motored onward (he�s 71, so I really have no excuse for my level of slothfulness). On Sunday afternoon NotSoSecret and I popped down to Milwaukee for the night before heading back north. We had dinner at a restaurant called the Safe House. Upon arrival, we were asked for the secret password, which we were unable to guess, so instead, to prove our loyalty, we had to pretend to ride invisible horses around the foyer. I was instructed to spank my horse in order to make it gallop faster. Finally we were granted entrance, and as we walked into the main dining area we were greeted by a round of applause from all of the diners who had been watching us on little televisions as we pranced around the foyer. We in turn got to watch other potential diners/spies be put through the test, but nobody else that I saw had to spank themselves. We decided to drive back by way of the Wisconsin Dells, a place which NotSoSecret had been hearing about since childhood. But when we got there, we found that someone had draped the entire area with waterslides. The town itself was frightening; it was like a great big carnival, with advertising screaming at you one mere foot back from the road. It was very �family� oriented; it ought to have been called Kid Vegas. We tried to find something scenic to eat lunch in front of, but it was so claustrophobic driving along the very crowded main drag that we soon gave up and got the hell out of there.
It will be interesting to see if anyone from work noticed that NotSoSecret and I took holidays at the same time. Today will be my first day back on the phones, an experience which I am not anticipating with much joy. I guess I probably should �take a shower� before I go in, to make the experience less unpleasant for everyone involved. 11:38 a.m. - 2006-08-10 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- NOW PLAYING.......&&&&&&&&&&&& andsometimeswhy75 &&&&&&&&........... | |||
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